Mis Novios

(Apparently, I have much to say today.)

So, it's come to my attention that I have a variety of boyfriends, and some people (who shall remain nameless), have even gone so far as to suggest I narrow the pool of eligible lifemates down. Riiiiiiiiiight. It's my fantasy and I'll play the game the way I want to play the game. So there.

Anyway, in lieu of Ox's recent CASTING OF FRIENDS exercise, I've decide to do a less exhausting version and give you a glossary of my celebrity boyfriends. Kind of like her Stephanox Association Associates (note to reader: this list, or at least my personal description, was concocted during our senior year of college).

Without further ado, I give you the glossary of my men (in no particular order, 'cept everyone knows that Jason is my favorite, so he gets top billing):

Jason Schwartzman: No explanation needed, but if I must... then it's the eyes! the mole(s)! the baby boy inquisitive look! the band (used to be in) he drummed for! His choice of movies (Rushmore, I Heart Huckabees, ShopGirl, Slackers, etc.) Total package, ladies. Total package.








Zach Braff: Garden State. Enough said... tho I could add "Scrubs."














Ewan McGregor: Best enjoyed whilst singing in Moulin Rouge. Oh! And naked, too.











Stephen Colbert: He had me on The Daily Show... and now he has me with his "truthiness." Adorable- even if he is a South Carolinian.










Johnny Damon: Ok, fine. So he's a (ick) Yankee (Stankee) now, but back in the day, he was my own... personal... Jesus.







Jason Varitek: Obviously, my favorite catcher is best viewed from behind. While fighting. Naturally.













Josh Lyman/Bradley Whitford: Asshole. Cocky. Self-assured. Political Genius. Anxious. Sleep Deprived. He deserves his adjectives in all CAPS. He deserves me.






Jimmy Smitts: Sexy latino... and the President-Elect. Yes please!












Jake Gyllenhaal: I was the only one on my block that saw Bubble Boy... and then I was one of the first, and only (for a while) to enjoy Donnie Darko. I even enjoyed The Good Girl- despite the horrific Jennifer Aniston... because of Jakey-poo. So when his royal hotness decided to buff it up for Jarhead, I already knew I adored. And I still do.








Peter Sarsgaard: Ok, fine. He's engaged to Maggie... and we all know how I feel about that... but he's still eye candy of the finest variety.








And, well, that's all I can recall... if you think of others, to post a comment and let me know. Gracias.